He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
