Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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