Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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