Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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