worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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