the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
