morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Boobs speak an international language.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
