Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
