She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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