I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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