And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
PANTIES FOUND
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