I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
