ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
