Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
