umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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