So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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