im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Randomize
