was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
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