i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
And then he peed in my hair
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize