I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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