so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
