the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
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