Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
