wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
