you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Randomize
