Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Randomize
