Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize