i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
the gays at disneyland are vicious
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
