pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
