thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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