Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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