Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
