wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
