On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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