he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Randomize