She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Randomize