Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Randomize
