her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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