Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
