He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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