Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
