she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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