you would pick up someone in the library
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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