North Korea, Best Korea!
im six kinds of drunk right now
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
