I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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