I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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