Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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