Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
