My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize