yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize
