i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Moan for me like Helen Keller
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
