as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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